Same passage. Same Truth. Different application. (I absolutely LOVE how God’s Word is so rich and powerful that it contains layer after layer after layer of treasures for us to dig out and enjoy, don’t you?)
So we’re in that passage from Judges that we looked at last time. ‘ I also will no longer drive out before them any of the nations which Joshua left when he died in order to test Israel by them, whether they will keep the way of the Lord to walk in it as their fathers did, or not. ‘ So the Lord allowed those nations to remain, not driving them out quickly; and He did not give them into the hand of Joshua. Now these are the nations which the Lord left, to test Israel by them (that is, all who had not experienced any of the wars of Canaan; only in order that the generations of the sons of Israel might be taught war, those who had not experienced it formerly) Judges 2:21-3:2
We already unpacked the context and gathered some treasure from this passage in last week’s Wednesday’s Word. If you missed it, just scroll down and check it out. Good foundation for today’s post.
When I pondered these verses, I thought about the situation of Israel. Then I thought about the application of truth to my own life.
But then God showed me more treasures and I dug deeper.
Parenting application.
Probably lots of them but I uncovered a couple.
First, parenting according to the principle of natural consequences.
Just as Israel experienced the consequences of disobedience and learned obedience from the things they suffered, so can I…and so can my kids. Instead of either meting out punishment or, worse, rescuing them every time, we need to let our children feel the pain associated with their actions. For example, letting them feel the pain of falling from that chair you told them not to climb. (Sounds cruel, right?) Or,instead of running that forgotten project up the school for the third time this year, let them get their grade docked….and accept the fallout from that consequence. (Oh, did I mention that oftentimes the parent has to suffer when these consequences ensue? :) In fact, I am pretty sure that avoiding our OWN personal pain is the #1 reason we rescue our kids so much!!) But this is how they will learn to adjust their behavior. Natural consequences. And the earlier we apply this principle in our parenting, the sooner our kids will learn on their own.
The other application that the Holy Spirit whispered to me was the importance of letting my kids learn how to fight. Wait, you say, my kids have that down pat! :) I don’t mean hand to hand combat or arguing with their siblings. I mean the kind of fighting you need to do in order to live a successful life. Hanging in there when things are tough. Battling through disappointment, failure, and rejection. Waging war against the natural tendencies not only to quit but also to cave to negative attitudes, victim-mentalities, and self-centeredness. Fighting to develop traits of responsibility, confidence, and maturity.
How do we learn how to fight like that?
By not having a picture-perfect life.
The bumps and curve balls of life are usually unpleasant but they are the very things that God can use to teach us to fight. The disappointment of not winning that championship. The feelings of rejection when there’s no prom date. The sting from the unfairness of a teacher or coach. The weariness of practicing untold hours and missing out on something fun in order to master that piano piece. The hurt when friends are disloyal. All those things are painful but the can be building blocks upon which God can build perseverance and compassion and confidence and discipline.
If we let Him.
The Spirit whispered to me that I must fight, too - I must fight my tendency to shield my kids from anything unpleasant. To counsel my Mama-Bear heart not to intervene every time I perceive my child has been wronged by someone else.To refrain from thinking that my goal should be to make their lives wrinkle-free.
As a parent, I need to let some “enemies”remain in the land (I don’t mean evil influences or activities! I mean the naturally occurring difficulties of life) so my kids can learn how to wage the war of life victoriously.
All from the book of Judges. Who knew!